My 1st Major Health Hurdle
At approximately the age of eight years young, I often suffered with bouts of brain crushing migraines. Words cannot fully do the description justice, but these head throbbing pulsations would occur on cue anytime I would do any physical activity that raised my heart rate to an anaerobic level. Think of sports like basketball, soccer, or baseball, which require use of fast twitch sprints at various times.Anytime my heart rate would escalate too high during these team sports, I would literally feel my chest start to vibrate which each beat as if my heart was about to pop out of my chest.It didn’t stop here though.That beating would then travel from my chest, up my throat, and all the way to the back of my head. At this point I would start to scream and grab my head as I began to crouch to my knees.Not a pleasant site for anyone in close proximity. I remember vividly seeing the eyes of teachers and parents go into shock for not knowing what was happening to me and how they could help.I on the other hand had become accustomed to this reality and did my best to “manage” it. This was usually done by closing my eyes and taking slow, deep long breaths. I’d do this until my heart rate would normalize, causing the head throbbing to eventually subside.During this period of my life (over twenty years ago) my mother frequently took me to the doctor, where several imaging CT scans were ran on my head.The hope was that we would gain clarity of figuring out what could’ve been the potential root cause of these head episodes.However, nothing.That’s what showed up each and every time.Nothing.The doctors advised that there was nothing showing up on the exams and that from their end there wasn't really anything else they could do.I was advised to do two things:
- Keep extra strength headache medicines close by and take those at the very first sign of head pain.
- Reduce or eliminate physical activities that required aerobic exertion altogether
For an active kid who grew up loving to be outside riding my bike or playing basketball, this was not an option I was willing to entertain.So I did what any young, determined kid would do.I continued to be active. Admittedly, I did however pay closer attention to my breathing rhythm and usually kept pretty good tabs on keeping it under wraps (high five to my younger self).
Fast Forward
Three years later I was now eleven and trying my hand at baseball for the first time. It was little league tryouts day and I was a bit nervous about how I would perform in this relatively new sport for me.The coach gathered everyone around home plate put us in separate groups. He explained what all drills we’d be doing throughout this first practice and the number of roster slots he had open on the team.It was at this moment when the nervousness turned into a competitive streak.The group I was assigned to was told to stay at home plate and line up in a single file line. Our first drill was based on speed and the coach informed us that he wanted to see who was the fastest running from home plate to first base.This was 60 feet and I was determined to finish first.It was now my turn to go."Ready – Set – GO!"I sprinted as fast as I could, chopping my feet one foot in front of the next.And DONE! “The coach shouted as I breezed past the first base bag.”“Good job” he yelled.I remember feeling on cloud nine at this point. Chest puffed out and easily a couple inches taller. I knew I dominated that run and was faster than everyone who went before me.However, that euphoria was short lived and quickly turned into a state of panic.I could now feel my heart racing and my head beginning to pulsate.A loud scream pierced the baseball field as I dropped down to one knee and began rubbing my head with the palm of my right hand.Startled, everyone stopped in their tracks and I could feel what felt like a million eyeballs staring directly at me.“You alright son, what happened?!?!” The coach rushed over.In between my choppy breaths I hurriedly told him I was fine and just needed to relax for a second in the dugout.“Are you sure, what did you injure. Lets call your parents?!”“No no it’s nothing and not necessary. I just need to sit for second. Trust me, I’ll be ready in just a minute.” I explained.This whole scene had played out for me many times before, to the point that I had become a pretty cool customer in handling it.By now I was in the dugout and the coaches told the other players I was fine and to get back to practice.For some reason this time felt different than all the others though. I started to feel a dull but noticeable pain in the left part of my stomach. I had never experienced this before. The headache also didn’t fully subside like I had grown accustomed too.
To the Hospital
Later that evening I tried my best to find comfort at home but I just felt off. I remember my whole body feeling heavy, as if I was carrying a bag of cement blocks on my shoulders.
- Headache medicine – check
- Food in stomach – check
- Normal breathing – check
- Trying to relax – check (but failing miserably)
After a bit of back and forth coordinating between my mother and father, my mom decided to take me to the emergency room so I could get checked out.As my vitals were taken the nurse commented that my blood pressure was extremely high. I don’t remember what it was at the time, but I remembered having issues with that before so I didn’t think too much of it.Then came in the doctor who said he wanted to run some additional test.Nothing seemed too unusual to me. However I was just in the fourth grade at the time so I really didn’t have a full grasp of standard medical routines.I was carted off into a different room to have an MRI Scan done. This tube like machine reminded me of something from outer space. I actually found it to be a bit scary looking. Like something you’d see in a horror movie.This was the first time I had ever seen and had this particular test performed. I remember just being told to try to relax and that it would take images of my stomach.“Hmm whatever” I thought.The tests were now done and my mother and I went back in the same room we had previously been in before.Silently waiting and uncomfortably cold, I was just ready to finally “feel better” and go home.Moments later the doc walks in with a folder and wide-eyed look on his face.“So Mrs. Bennett I need to show you something”He opens the folder, takes out a couple x-rays and places them on a light board.“There appears to be an 11 cm mass on the left lower abdomen of your son”“Excuse me!” She says in a skeptical yet fiery tone“Yes, I’m sorry but there is definitely an abnormal mass about the size of a grapefruit here,” as he points to the image.“You’ve got to be kidding me!” My mom shouts abruptly.Not 100% sure of what’s going on, I softly blurt out “A grapefruit, what’s that?”The doctor takes his hands and measures them in the shape of the fruit while explaining to us that we need to immediately prepare for surgery.“We won’t be able to definitively know whether or not it’s malignant until we get in the operating room”From that point everything is a bit of a blur for me. A few hours later I woke up in a recovery room, heavily sedated.Good news. The tumor was completely removed.Not so great news. It was attached to my left adrenal gland, which ultimately was removed as well in the procedure.This event, which happened just over twenty years ago, set forth the foundation and importance of paying close attention to my health. I didn’t know this at the time, but it’s clear as day now looking back on it.While this technically was the beginning, and I’ve had several adversarial bouts since then, it painted a very clear picture for me.Life is a very precious thing. Here I was just yearning to be a normal kid, yet was shown from an early age how fragile and quick a circumstance can change, in the blink of an eye.This early life stressor proved to be on that later on forced me to look closely in the mirror at. We all come into this world with a certain genetic expression that works as our initial blueprint.No matter what we may deal with at various times regarding our health, we all reach a point when we must make a choice to live. Not just live to be a human breathing machine and go through the motions, but actually live a life of vibrancy, efficiency, and constant progression.Let's take this next step together. A step into the truest, most authentic self-expressions of whom each of us came here to be.-BB