How to Mindfully use Social Media

As I presently sit here and reflect back on different lessons, as well as new behavior patterns I feel fortunate to have a much better grasp on, there’s one particular area that I see many people struggle with today.

This has to do with social media and how to balance the proverbial fine line of being mindfully productive, versus anxiously overwhelmed.

With so many gadgets, apps, and technological advancements occurring at a dynamically swift pace, it can feel like a gargantuan task in itself, just keeping up with what’s new.

As an introvert and highly sensitive man (linked with more info on the traits + a quick self-test), I recognize all too well how easy it can be to become mentally overwhelmed, scattered, and feel overall exhausted from too much mental stimulation.

On one side, where we are on a technological level, is truly beautiful to see.

Exceptionally high-speed internet, easily accessible ways to conveniently connect with others from all around the world, and truly having the opportunity to instantaneously receive breaking or important news in live time, is something even twenty years ago was unheard of.

Also, I believe there are collective advantages that this has created, which allows more access to learn about other cultures and see unique possibilities of how others are living their lives.

As an example, I remember several years ago, back in 2014, coming across certain individuals who were living abroad and sharing pictures, as well as videos, of their experience online.

At the time I was still working within my corporate sales career, and even though the majority of my days consisted of being in an open spaced office cubicle, I felt a deep sense of inspiration by seeing others who were living lifestyles completely different to mine.

I was intrigued and even though I didn’t embody that within my own daily experience, I energetically felt like I was a part of it and could identify with the possibility more succinctly, through the lens of seeing others who were actually living examples of it.

These of course are the uplifting models.

The ones that can truly help in the expansion of one’s mind, and can serve as motivational pulls to create new life visions, ground into the cultivation new goals or intentions, and mindfully continuing the process of progressing forward.

However, on somewhat of the polar opposite side of the spectrum, there is definitely a such things as social media overload too.

I don’t see this part often talked about enough.

Yes there’s the relatively new Netflix documentary that came out last year called Social Dilemma, which did a great job of painting a picture of what constant consumption of social media can not only do to one’s mind on a dopamine level (possibly creating strong addictive behaviors for many), but also how deep within the brain stem it can go, depending on the age and amount of consumption by an individual person.

I found nothing surprising about what was highlighted within the documentary, however I’ll be frank in admitting that I feel there was a more of a fatalistic view or vibe that was portrayed from the film.

Maybe it’s just me, but I found it to spend a disproportionate amount of time speaking to the problem, without addressing many alternative solutions.

This is the reason I felt led to speak a bit on this, as well as a share three ways one can create a healthy relationship to social media (if it is indeed something you find yourself having difficulties creating balance around).

1.     Turn Your Phone on Do Not Disturb

If you’re one who finds yourself easily getting caught up in the loops of different media channels, I’d advise you to go into your phone settings and turn on the “Do Not Disturb” feature at different intervals throughout the day.

As an example, blocking off 45-50 minutes at a time to focus on one (1) specific task is a great way to start. Just pick one item that you’d like to channel your energy towards, and look at that near hour as a sacred time for you to harness your creative power towards.

By creative power I mean one’s ability to stay focused on specific tasks at a time.

Science has proven that our human brains are far more adept at doing one thing at time (I’m speaking directly to you self-proclaimed multitaskers – as I used to be one myself).

Sometimes it can appear that others are extra special in this arena (as ‘focus’ may come more easily to them – it actually does happen to be one of my top personal strengths via StrengthsFinder, coming in at #9).

However, even with saying that, ‘focus’ is a quality we all have access to – though it may just come more naturally to certain people, enabling them to do a much better job of utilizing it.

With that being said, once you commit to both the time and task at hand, the next step would be to turn your phone on the DND function just before said time.

Even if you’re easily tempted, be sure to put your phone completely away out of arms or eyes glance (in order to prevent the habitual trigger of grabbing it).

For the 50-minutes, focus on what you desire to do with the time and proceed forward by doing it.

As an example, at the time of writing this article right now, I set a timer for 50-minutes and am now at the 33rd minute mark. My phone is out of sight and my intention is to complete the next 17-minutes uninterrupted (even if I don’t finish what I set out for in the first sitting).

2.     Create a To-Do List the evening Before

I’ve found listing out the activities I plan to do for the following day, the evening before, to be very useful.

It centers the mind into the present moment, and I compare it to a level of intentional meditation.

You’re essentially not only organizing your mind to put together what is most needed for the following day, but you’re also writing it down too (which is laying a tangible foundation to what it is you will be doing).

Our brains are wired for simplicity.

It automatically focuses on whatever it is we put the most attention towards.

This is akin to the “where attention goes energy flows” saying that you may have heard before.

If you know you have a highly creative mind that is especially susceptible to new input, I’ve found that oftentimes writing the most necessary activities down on paper and referring to it, can help one better focus on the ‘main thing.’

Of course, thoughts and other distractions may still appear, but with the right intentional attention, plus agreeing and creating the new behavior patterns (which can take upwards of 21+ days to neurologically form) to be mindfully processed, helps create new neural connective patterns in the brain, which ultimately create newer practices that then become more autonomous.

3.     Have an Accountability Partner

This is something that has been an absolute game changer for me.

While I recognize the power of solitude and doing things solo, I also over the years have grown to on an even deeper level, recognize the power of accountable support.

It’s something I’ve been intentional on creating for myself more consistently over the past three years.

Rather it be through working one-on-one with personal coaches, creating an agreement with another purpose-oriented colleague who has a track record of consistently following through, or being involved in supportive communities with other likeminded people, this has been an area that while originally uncomfortable for me to lean into, has now become one that I openly desire and plan to have in some capacity for the rest of my life.

Verbally expressing and agreeing to doing a certain tasks or actions by a certain date to a coach, mentor, or colleague, is a great opportunity to not only hold oneself accountable, but creates the opportunity for others to mindfully call you forward too (when out of integrity with your words).

I believe this to be very powerful too because sometimes we’re truly unable to see certain areas within our own lives where we may either be blocked, or aren’t authentically showing up to the degree that we communicate.

A mentor or coach who you can trust, believes in you, allows a safe space for you to express what is going on in your life (especially if you find yourself at time where you feel stuck), and is willing to say the things to you that most others in your circle often don’t, can create a vortex where when those inevitable periods show up (when we feel off balance and want to hide), we’re not only able to see them with an earlier awareness, but also be in relationship with someone who can truly see us, and help lift us up, leading to those particular periods not lasting nearly as long (as they would have in the past when we tried just ‘pushing’ ourselves, or going at it alone).

Sometimes we all in this human experience of Earth School can use a little loving pull forward, so we can continue forward on our life’s journey.

One last bonus tip:

If you find your consumption rate to be exceptionally high and you’ve never gone more than a day without deeply scrolling or consuming social media content, I’d invite you to 7-Day cleanse.

The same way that others associate the term “cleansing” with removing certain foods from one’s body (in order to crowd in more highly nutritious fruits and vegetables), how about giving the exact same try but only with social media this time?

If you’re game and are interested in doing so within a group of others who are willing to do the same, leave a comment below or send me a direct e-mail to brandon@brandonbennett.com

If enough people are interested, I’ll create a small supportive group where others can do it together, share thier experiences and insights, as well as any noticeable shifts they may see during the period too.

However all in all, and regardless, please continue to remember that you got this.. always have, and always will.

And anything that is keeping you from experiencing deeper levels of inner peace, joy, and happiness, is a thing that you may lovingly do better, without :- )

With Love,

Brandon